June 24, 2011

Interestingly enough I feel much better now that I have a supervisor. I work much better this way. This is the second time I have written about having a supervisor so it must be important to me.

June 22, 2011

Had my Grandpa Miller survived he would be 109 today. Happy Birthday, Grandpa. We will be having a talk one day ...

I am feeling a bit out-of-sorts. You know, the kind where you don't want to do anything. And not even my favorite activity will help me out. Even $1Million cannot help this.

There is not enough _________ in the world to resolve the way I feel right now.

June 21, 2011

Well, after 4 candy bars and a full on pout I appear to have adjusted to Kelly being gone. But now I am seriously thirsty.

OK, so in an effort to make my life more beautiful I am keeping a couple of books to cut up. They have some nice photos of the Sistine Chapel and the English countryside. I need to do something to elevate my outlook.

I nee to continue meditation. I worked on "Deep Pool" most of last week. I read through "The Goddess Within" yesterday but did not have my earphones so did not fo any further. One of the cd's I brought home from Dad's was not suitable for meditation even though it was labeled as such.

June 20, 2011

I miss Kelly. Hopefully, I will not do a whole depression over this. She is not responding well to the PT and there is new evidence of MS type plaques in her brain. This is something that has come up after this last surgery. This makes me so sad.

June 16, 2011

OK. So, I am reading this book, "Delivering Happiness" a sort of biography by Tony Hsieh, the guy that just sold zappo's for $1Billion. Some of what Mr Hsieh srites about is very familiar to me. I can recall quite clearly some of the events he describes. I kind of feel like this was supposed to be a part of myu life. So now I have some parental resentment to deal with. And I probably won't be able to post this message on my blog while Dad is still alive.

June 10, 2011

I still feel energized not anxious. I have happy days in sync with what's going on around me. I am still working toward opening my own business, so I feel like I am making forward progress.

I want to see Linda and have lunch with her and brainstorm. I really, really miss her. I still wish I was part of her daily life. Living with Susan at this time is where I am supposed to be. And Susan has taught me a lot. And when it is time for me to move on I will miss her too. Their energies are very different.

June 8, 2011

After reaffirming my intent yesterday I am feeling much better. I did some more planning and studying as well as a bit of research.

So with Buffy's assistance I will continue to work towards my goal. I really feel calm and motivated when I put my focus on a start up. This tells me I am on the right path. Yeah! I love finding a source for quiet energy.

June 7, 2011

I still want to start up a business. Buffy is helping me. I think she helped me grow up. I am still very much in the planning stages of this.

I need to do time studies. And I need to make samples and get market feedback. I also need to contact Penny for her feedback.

June 6, 2011

Had a weekend and now I am at work. Susie and I did not quite come to blows and I am not at all sure how that happened. The whole weekend wasn't like that. We went over to Debbie's on Saturday and vacuumed, dusted and cleaned. Debbie's mother, Ida Rae, became quite ill with what turned out to be an aneurism. She underwent a long surgery to repair the damage. However, there was a blood clot that developed later. Ida Rae had a seizure and stopped breathing. She finally passed away last weekend. Debbie and her kids, now grown, have been busy with the details that come after. They left OK Sunday morning and stopped in NM for the night. Susie and I have been watching the cats who I am very sure will be more than happy to see their people today.

May 31, 2011

I still hate my job and I'm still OK with that.

There is no way I will do custom sewing. I learned that dislike from my mother. And the public wants the impossible for free or at cost.

Circumstances at work have gone from bad to worse. Three units moved in. and while they do have secretaries they are temp or on loan. I wonder if they even have a notary. So now I am feeling fucked over again. and I can tell that the receptionist is no longer loving her job.