I managed to get to the office at 7:00 this morning. I was aiming for 7:30. I’m kind of stunned here. But it is all good, we got Susan out of the house in time for her physical therapy.
I have been shopping today, a little grocery and Cmas shopping. I have more planned on the way home.
December 23, 2009
Dec 16, 2009
Already I am starting on my list of resolutions:
Give up late night TV – not really a good sleep aide.
Start dreaming again.
Finish the Trees.
Lose 50 lbs – that’s one lb a week with two extra weeks to get by on.
It is 74F outside but it is kind of cold inside. I think the a/c is still on. I wish they would switch over to heat. At least in the mornings anyway.
Yesterday, I received a Christmas card from Linda W. I was surprised. I was further surprised to find a photo of Nick inside. I’m beginning to think that I may have done something good. Or perhaps stumbled upon a forgotten secret.
Give up late night TV – not really a good sleep aide.
Start dreaming again.
Finish the Trees.
Lose 50 lbs – that’s one lb a week with two extra weeks to get by on.
It is 74F outside but it is kind of cold inside. I think the a/c is still on. I wish they would switch over to heat. At least in the mornings anyway.
Yesterday, I received a Christmas card from Linda W. I was surprised. I was further surprised to find a photo of Nick inside. I’m beginning to think that I may have done something good. Or perhaps stumbled upon a forgotten secret.
Dec 15, 2009
How have your fears caused you difficulty in your life?
It is a good idea to watch out for boredom. It will take you by surprise. I have gotten into several different kinds of trouble due to boredom.
Do you see any patterns in your addictive behaviors? If so, explain them in detail.
Oh yeah. There is a definite emotional quality to my addiction. And it tends to start with boredom. Then come the restlessness and pacing then the OCD pops out. And every so often I just say enough and walk away from the whole mess.
OCD, there is another whole 12 Step program to work through.
It is a good idea to watch out for boredom. It will take you by surprise. I have gotten into several different kinds of trouble due to boredom.
Do you see any patterns in your addictive behaviors? If so, explain them in detail.
Oh yeah. There is a definite emotional quality to my addiction. And it tends to start with boredom. Then come the restlessness and pacing then the OCD pops out. And every so often I just say enough and walk away from the whole mess.
OCD, there is another whole 12 Step program to work through.
Dec 14, 2009
I saw my regular doctor today for my medication check. The scale says that I am down 17 lbs since September. I do not feel it nor do I see it. But then that is maybe 6% of my body weight.
Dec 11, 2009
What are your fears?
I am afraid that I will die without finishing my work. I am afraid that I will die and my quilts will be trashed. I am afraid people will hate when I am dead. And boredom, I am certain that boredom is the main reason that people return to work or seek employment in the first place.
I am afraid that I will die without finishing my work. I am afraid that I will die and my quilts will be trashed. I am afraid people will hate when I am dead. And boredom, I am certain that boredom is the main reason that people return to work or seek employment in the first place.
Dec 10, 2009
I may make a half mile of “on purpose” walking.
Several people are happy now that they have gotten their calendars and planners from Sunshine. And Michelle is already getting appointment books for the reception area. The babies are happy.
Several people are happy now that they have gotten their calendars and planners from Sunshine. And Michelle is already getting appointment books for the reception area. The babies are happy.
Dec 9, 2009
I really do not feel like working. I have some time off coming up but right now … so now is the time to suck it up and work through the feeling.
Dec 8, 2009
We had quite the storm last night. Princess insisted on making sure I knew there was something going on – ALL NIGHT LONG.
It has been kind of cold all day long, both yesterday and today. This may be the office that I can wear long sleeves in.
It has been kind of cold all day long, both yesterday and today. This may be the office that I can wear long sleeves in.
Dec 7, 2009
Saturday I drove out to Gilbert and spent most of the day with Dad. I have finally taken possession of Mom’s old Bernina which I have wanted to have since she passed away. Don’t know what Laura was thinking by asking for it and then trying to trade up with it.
Dec 2, 2009
I’m already “jones”ing to make some changes. But then it is less than 20 days to the Solstice.
December 12, 2009
Nov 24, 2009
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Very busy at work but I am finally finished with the 20+ boxes of closed files. Now I am just working on the recently closed files.
Nov 19, 2009
I saw Dr Griffith today. He says my knee appears to be OK. The joint feels stable and the tenderness is actually a good sign. However, he is not happy about my blood sugar numbers being elevated. I know we are talking about 128 rather 200 or 300 but it is still not a good thing for it to go up. The idea is for it to come down to around 90 and STAY there.
Nov 18, 2009
I will be seeing Dr Griffith in the morning. I am kind of impressed with the bruise on my right leg. I plan on showing it off.
Describe your relationships with your nuclear family (spouse and children) if that is different now from your family of origin. Is there anything that you wish that you could erase from this part of your life?
I used to think that “I will never do what my mother did.” But the more I tried to be different the more I was the same; very sad, really.
If you were to describe your family's major themes, what would they be?
Violence towards women and children.
Nov 16, 2009
I am starting to feel OK now. My right knee still hurts a lot but it is more of a bump and bruise feel to it now. And the blood, as it is draining, is now in my foot and ankle areas. Kind of colorful.
And it was back to the dentist for my regular teeth cleaning. I got to see Donna and we talked about what happened and how well she did on the Breast Cancer walk. My teeth still appear to be fine and she told me what I should watch for as far as a reaction to a sudden trauma.
Nov 13, 2009
I used the CPAP last night!!!! And I feel better for it. While I did not wake up with a headache I did wake up early. So it will probably be a while for that to settle.
Nov 12, 2009
I saw Dr Pritchard today. The splint and the small stitches have been removed. I can breathe and blow my nose again. He wants me to leave my glasses off for at least the next 6 weeks to let the bones continue to mend. Basically, I had a nose lift to cover the divot on the bridge of my nose.
Nov 10, 2009
Last Thursday night on Nov 5th, I tripped and fell while we were walking the dogs. I broke my nose and the frame on my glasses peeled off a flap of skin. And I had to have surgery to repair the damage. My knees are bruised and swollen and the wounds on my face itch like crazy. And the injury to my elbow is now back to square one. So that therapy has to start over.
On Friday, I had surgery to set the fracture and repair the skin. Dad is just full of curiosity to know what technique the surgeon used. And on Saturday I had my fill of hospital care and insisted that I be allowed to go home. They let me go and I was able to see the dogs and cat and sleep in my own bed.
Nov 5, 2009
Did you share a similar personality with those in your family or were they very different than you?
I am under the impression that your family makes you to some extent. So there are a lot of similarities. However, there are some things that I have always known were wrong about them.
Do you think that these similarities or differences caused problems in your life? If so, explain.
This caused a fair amount of conflict throughout my childhood.
Describe your relationships with your family of origin. Do you have conflicts with any siblings or with your parents? Are you avoiding these matters in your family?
There are still some conflicts. We were very mean little kids and behaved horribly with each other.
A couple of months after my mother passed away I realized that I was no longer afraid to visit my father.
Nov 3, 2009
Describe the earliest memories of your life.
My earliest memory is of my mother trying to kill me when I was two years old.
Nov 2, 2009
What kind of personality do you exhibit at home? At school? At work? When no-one is around?
Outright bitch is what I am thinking. But I wasn’t always like this. I used to be nice to people. I like playing but there is no playtime right now.
What have you done to cover and conceal your addictive behaviors? What other deceptions did this lead to?
I sometimes try to sneak but then I just start to carry things around openly. Sneaking is for starting out. The cover and conceal happens when I lie to myself about it not being THAT serious. You know, the I-can’t-believe-it’s-that-big-a-deal statements.
Oct 30, 2009
What decisions have you made in your life that made a significant impact on your life? How did you go about making those decisions?
Getting married, getting divorced. Getting a job. Having a hobby. There are lots of decisions that I have made that have changed in my life. Starting a facebook account has changed my life. I’m not sure what the nostalgia is about but it has been fun and insightful to get onto facebook and reconnect with people that I knew in high school.
How much of your life have you used up already? If you drew a time line of your life, where would you be now?
I am a little more than half way through. Does it sound funny to say that I have always known that I would live to be 80?
Oct 29, 2009
Have you failed to do things that you KNOW that you should have done? If so, then explain in detail.
Boy, and how, it is usually because someone else wants me to do their job or live their life.
Describe your relationship with your friends, co-workers or neighbors. Is there something that you wish that you could do over again? If so, explain in detail.
I wish that I could talk better and get along with others in a smoother friendlier fashion. I t really bothers me that sometimes I cannot communicate very well. Some of it is my inability to speak with a free and easy tongue. It feels like it gets all tangled up.
Describe in detail any major experiences in your life that you believe changed your life forever afterwards (good or bad).
Meeting Linda W and learning that women are good. That would be a major good experience that changed my life. She taught me to trust my intuition and to listen to my inner voice. I found some of my wisdom from her. A very good person. I have drifted out of her life and I miss her but I am just not able to make the time.
Oct 28, 2009
We had a big old haboob yesterday. That’s strong dust storm to the uninformed. It was mostly in the Central region of
Oct 26, 2009
I think that I am having trouble breathing. And I mean other than allergies.
Describe the faults that you most detest in others. Do you have any of these traits yourself?
Well, yeah, that is the way it works. Please see the chart to understand more fully.
Put a checkmark beside any of the following traits that you despise in others. Also check whether you see these traits in yourself.
Traits that I Despise in Others | |||||
Trait | In Others | In Myself | Trait | In Others | In Myself |
Selfishness | x | x | Greedy | x | x |
Cowardice | Snobbish | ||||
Dishonesty | Sarcastic | ||||
Fearfulness | Hypercritical | x | x | ||
Controlling | x | x | Gossip | ||
Manipulative | x | x | Tightwad | ||
Intimidating | Harsh | ||||
Power-hungry | Unforgiving | x | x | ||
Possessive | x | x | Verbally abusive | ||
Prejudiced | Physically abusive | ||||
Overly dependent | x | x | Sexually abusive | ||
Procrastinating | Impatient | x | x | ||
Judgmental | Adulterous | ||||
Preoccupied | Sneakiness | ||||
Lying | x | x | Ungrateful | x | x |
Cheating | Cynical | ||||
Intolerant | x | x | Bitter | x | x |
Self-Pitying | Full of Rage | x | x | ||
Jealous | Envious | x | x | ||
Insecure | |||||
Now I feel bad about Rebecca. She made a complaint about our run in a little over a week ago. And it turns out that she is facing some serious issues regarding her job performance. That was one thing that I did not know about. Don’t know that it would have made that big a difference in the outcome. But now I do have a different view on her.
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